Finding the right memory care facility for your loved one can feel like searching for the perfect coffee shop—they all say they’re great, but you need to make sure they can actually deliver. Except, in this case, the stakes are a lot higher than burnt espresso. Your goal is to find a community where your family member can feel safe, truly cared for, and supported during this next chapter of their life.
To help, we’ve put together a list of questions you should ask when touring memory care facilities. These questions will help you cut through the sales pitches and get to the heart of what each community offers.
What is Memory Care, and Why Do These Questions Matter?
Before jumping in, it’s worth clarifying: what is memory care?
Memory care facilities specialize in providing support for individuals with Alzheimer’s, dementia, or other memory-related conditions. On top of healthcare and assistance with daily tasks, they create an environment designed to keep residents safe and as independent as possible.
Now, back to those questions. The truth is, a facility can have fancy brochures and spotless reviews, but just as you wouldn’t buy a car without a test drive, you shouldn’t choose a care facility without digging deeper.
1. What’s the Staff-to-Resident Ratio?
This may sound like one of those boring math questions from middle school, but trust us, ratios matter. Memory care requires personalized attention, and if the staff are stretched too thin, your loved one might not get the support they need. Ask about the ratio during different times of the day and how the staff handle unexpected call-outs or vacations.
Pro tip: A lower ratio—like 1 staff for every 5 residents—is generally better. Bonus points if the facility brags about having specialized dementia-trained personnel!
2. What are the Staff’s Qualifications and Training?
Not everyone is a natural caregiver, even if they’ve been trained to be one. Make sure to ask if the staff receive ongoing training in managing dementia or Alzheimer’s care. Day-to-day duties in memory care are different from those in other healthcare fields, and team members should be equipped to handle sudden mood swings, memory lapses, or even just a tough day with empathy and professionalism.
3. What Safety Measures are in Place?
We hear you—it feels bad to even think about needing safety locks and cameras for your loved one. But ensuring their safety is essential.
Ask about features designed to prevent accidents or wandering, like secure doors, alarm systems, grab bars, and fall prevention measures. Do residents wear GPS trackers or have medical alert systems? These measures aren’t just there for emergencies; they help foster peace of mind for both families and residents.
4. What’s Their Approach to Activities and Social Engagement?
Trust me—you don’t want your loved one bored and binge-watching reruns all day (even if “The Golden Girls” is legendary). Memory care should foster a sense of purpose and provide enriching activities tailored to cognitive abilities.
Ask about the types of social programs offered, as well as their frequency. Does the facility encourage group activities, art therapy, gardening, or music sessions? Are residents motivated to move, be social, and participate, or is it more of a “do as you please” setup?
5. What’s on the Menu?
Meal times tell you a lot about how well a facility understands its residents. Memory conditions don’t just affect the mind—they can also impact appetite, taste preferences, and even the ability to eat independently.
Ask about the dining setup. Are meals personalized? Can they accommodate dietary restrictions or cultural food preferences? Look for facilities where residents are assisted with dignity if they can’t feed themselves. Oh, and take a peek at the menu when you visit. Bland casseroles? Hard pass.
6. How Do They Handle Medical Care and Emergencies?
Does the facility have medical staff on-site, or do they rely on external providers? How do they manage medication, doctor’s appointments, or sudden emergencies?
A good follow-up question is to ask under what circumstances they would transfer someone to the hospital. Not all facilities manage all health changes on-site, and this is important to know upfront.
7. What’s the Visiting Policy?
Your loved one may prefer a quiet, intimate space, but you’ll still want the flexibility to visit whenever possible—especially on the bad days, when they just need a familiar face.
Find out if the facility allows flexible visiting hours. Do they have guidelines for family participation in activities or events? A community that encourages family involvement generally has happier residents.
8. How Do They Handle Transitions and End-of-Life Care?
We know this one isn’t easy to think about, but understanding how the facility handles life’s transitions can help provide a clearer picture of whether it’ll be the right fit long-term.
Ask if the care plans adapt as needs change. Can residents transition to hospice care while staying in their room, or will they need to move again? A seamless plan will reduce unnecessary stress for everyone involved.
9. What’s the Cost Structure, and What’s Included?
Okay, now we’re getting into the nitty-gritty. Some facilities have all-inclusive pricing, while others bill à la carte for different services. Find out exactly what’s included in the rates and how often they increase charges. Transparency here will help you avoid surprise bills.
Pro tip? If you need financial assistance, ask if they accept Medicaid or Veterans Affairs benefits and what the qualification processes are like.
10. Can I Speak With Current Families or Residents?
Reviews are helpful, but nothing beats hearing from those already living or engaging with the facility. Don’t be shy—ask for references or to speak with current residents’ families. They can give you honest insights about their experience and the day-to-day realities of life there.
Take a Deep Breath—You’ve Got This
Choosing a memory care facility isn’t a decision made lightly, but taking the time to ask the right questions can help you sleep a little easier. Remember, it’s okay to take your time. Tour more than one facility. Trust your instincts. And most importantly, make sure your loved one feels comfortable, whether that’s with a daily routine or that perfect cup of coffee (even if you had to smuggle in their favorite roast).
Still feeling overwhelmed? Start with a short list, ask these 10 questions, and take a tour to see the place in action. Care decisions are never easy, but equipped with these thoughtful questions, you’ll be one step closer to finding a home your loved one deserves.
