With Survivors, Always

October is dedicated to Domestic Violence Awareness, a time for communities to unite in the effort to end domestic violence. This year’s theme of the month is “With Survivors, Always,” a powerful call to action that explores the meaning of safety, support and solidarity.

Throughout the country, the sorority Alpha Chi Omega supports the importance of DVA through its philanthropy. At Kansas State, AXO works directly with the Manhattan Crisis Center, which offers free, confidential and trauma-informed services 24/7.

Upperclassmen mentor new members throughout the recruitment process to ensure the importance of their philanthropy is embedded from day one. Freshman in marketing Gabby Poe recently joined AXO and said she takes pride knowing the philanthropy she supports gives back in a special way. 

“Alpha Chi Omega is strongly motivated to promote, educate and support healthy relationships within Manhattan,” Poe said. “Not only does Alpha Chi raise money for our national philanthropy — Domestic Violence Awareness and Prevention — we also raise money for our local philanthropy, the Manhattan Crisis Center. We work very closely with the Manhattan Crisis Center to assist in renovations and be there for the women and children within our community.”

During the month of awareness and the month before, Alpha Chi hosts numerous events to help spread the word on the importance of healthy relationships. 

“This year, we hosted our Alpha Chi Sweetheart Week, where male students at K-State competed in events throughout the week,” Poe said. “These events included an ice cream social, volleyball tournament, lip-syncing battle and a race we called ‘Walk a Mile in her Shoes.’ In my opinion, that event was the most beneficial towards DV awareness because the men got to see what it is like to run in heels. We also host many other events throughout the year that we cannot wait to announce soon.”

Healthy relationship advocacy is a key part of Alpha Chi that Poe participates in, and she believes it deserves more open discussion in our society. 

“As a society, we do not talk about what healthy vs unhealthy relationships truly mean enough,” Poe said. “Our goal on the K-State campus is to educate our community on the importance of being able to see and understand what domestic abuse is. Domestic violence can happen to anyone and is possible in every kind of relationship, not just romantic relationships. I think this is a very important topic for my generation, and I hope to be able to educate people better on this through Alpha Chi Omega.”

The understanding of protection and prevention of domestic abuse has allowed Poe to open up and share her own personal story.

“I wanted to join Alpha Chi Omega because of my personal connections with DV,” she said. “I grew up with the understanding that my mother did not like speaking to her sister. As I became older, I was informed that my aunt would try to manipulate my mother through lying about little and big things. Now, as an adult looking back, I am very proud of my mother for cutting all communication off with her sister,” she said.

Her initial drive, rooted in her family’s complexity, deepened into a broader grasp of the issue as she learned more about the difficulty of abuse. 

“I now understand that DV can come in many different forms, including verbal, physical and emotional abuse. As a society, I think verbal and emotional abuse is not talked about enough.”

Another resource is the Morrison Family Center for Student Well-being, where Dr. Stephanie Jacobs is the CAPS assistant director.

“Lafene provides a medical examination, STI testing and STI treatment,” Jacobs said. “In addition, Lafene providers offer medical advice and support, and CAPS counselors offer confidential counseling and resources. Lafene providers work closely with the Forensic Nursing Care Specialists at Ascension Via Christi Hospital, who provide emergency medical care, a forensic examination with a trained sexual assault nurse, STI testing and treatment and follow-up support.”

Lafene’s role in the university’s Domestic Violence Awareness Month is to provide medical care and support for those who may find it hard to reach out. 

“Lafene is a partner to any campus-wide prevention efforts and works to educate students who come into the Health Center about domestic violence,” Jacobs said. “We specifically collaborate with the Center for Advocacy, Response and Education (CARE) office on campus.”

CARE is just one program that Lafene has worked with to help students. CARE assistant director Libby Thorson said the program offers help for more than just one category of domestic abuse. 

“CARE provides confidential advocacy to survivors of sexual assault, rape, relationship abuse and stalking at K-State,” Thorson said. “We serve both students and employees. Advocates are here to offer support and aid survivors in exploring their options.”

CARE staff are there to hear survivors’ stories of violence and help connect them to resources. 

“Our services include academic support, crisis intervention and safety planning, court accompaniment, reporting support, financial support for therapy, referrals to campus and community resources, assistance with protection orders, along with other support,” Jacobs said. “Our office can also consult with you if you’re worried about a friend and are unsure on how to best support them. We also offer survivor-centered programming, volunteer opportunitie and student employment.”

If you or someone you know is struggling, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline. You can connect with a live advocate by texting START to 88788 or by calling 800-799-SAFE (7233). For those uncomfortable with speaking one-on-one, there are other options, such as an AI chatbot available on their website.